GUESS WHO’S BACK BLOGGING!!

I’m not gonna lie, I was boycotting the website for a while because it got changed and my pictures are all messed up on each of my blogs 😔, BUT NOT ANYMORE! I’ve been using my little WhatsApp group chat to send updates and pictures (let me know if you want to be added), but I do want to still use this resource to share about what God is doing as I’m SQUADLEADING GAP YEAR! 

Currently, my squad is debriefing in Sorrento, Italy. We spent a week in Rome to explore and do ATL (ask the Lord) where we ask God what to do/ who to talk to/whatever else. We leave for Nepal in three days!

Let me quickly run it back for some context...

The first night of leader training for my summer Jamaica trip, I got asked to pray about squad leading gap year for this year. After praying about it for a few weeks, I felt like He was giving me green lights to go. The original route was Italy, Nepal, Thailand, Indonesia, and Australia. Soon after I said yes to squad leading, Jamaica was added to the route. WHATTT! This is also the trip that Marcus signed up for way early on in the year, so the fact that I’m with him again is wild. There are also a few other people I knew before who are on my squad now!

Leader training and training camp was hard this time around. Classic. It felt a little like my first time at leader training for my Africa squad where I was just being broken and God was drawing me to only come and sit at His feet. Training camp was a week, then we went to domestic ministry in Adrian, Georgia for a week. This all feels sooo long ago already wow.

Then we pulled up to Jamaica. BACK IN JAMAICA! Didn’t ever think I’d be back, but there I was. Over 50 people were staying in this base. All of the girls stayed inside, while all the guys slept in tents or in a building without AC outside. There was hardly space to be alone. Community spaces were small and the outside heat prevented us from communing out there. Even though circumstances were uncomfortable sometimes, there was still beauty in the sky, the trees, the beach, the rain, the birds, and the people. I got to talk to people in the community that I never thought I would see again. To be back there when just three months ago I had been praying about leading this trip was so unexpected.

Each week, ministry was different in teams. My team, Team Fullness, has 6 girls: Abby, Ayslee, Evelyn, Kielynn, Kyla, and Malayna. First, my team was on roofs, then Base Ops (taking care of the base), then ALT (kids ministry at a school), then back on roofs for the last week. We were in Jamaica for 5 weeks. My team spent most “Team Times” sharing our testimonies with each other.

In my leadership team, I have 4 co-leaders: Carlee, Ceciley, Skylar, and Nate. My mentors Banks and Caroline, who are married with their baby boy Linny, are on the field with us this whole year. We have two coaches (Tim and Karen) who stay in Alaska to support all of us, and occasionally join us on the field for debriefs.

Things didn’t slow down from time in the States like we expected them to in Jamaica. A lot of the time my mind felt a chaotic, windy storm. God is doing a NEW THING in me. This is the longest trip I’ve led, which means I’m in the fire for things I would compensate for knowing that I would go home soon. That is not the case now. As I’m looking back, and even thinking about where I am now, I see the ways I still want to know how to do things by myself, be comfortable, rely on my own understanding, and try to earn approval from Him and from others. This is the year He pulls these things out of me. Before, I was able to seek deliverance by looking ahead, but now it’s only by trusting that the Lord will have His way in me regardless of if I yield or not. Talking to Carlee before I was writing this today, she said, “God revealed to me that I’m not actually hear to impart what He’s taught me or that this team would leave looking like mini Carlees, but that I would be refined.”

Trusting that God will have His way in this squad, in team Fullness, in my leadership team, and in me. Opening my hands to surrender all that I have in order for Him to hand me the fresh bread.

Thank you Father that it’s all about You and all about bringing You glory. Come and have Your way.